The Personal Journal of POTUS

December 13, 2008

The Intricacies of Leaving

Filed under: Economy,Politics,Satire — fakepotus @ 9:55 pm
Tags: , ,

I am just trying to get through this last month and you’d think it should be just nice dinners and relaxing weekends, but no, I have to keep dealing with this BS.  Yesterday, Goldfinger (Ron Gettelfinger) called and begged for money after the Senate essentially tossed him out on his ass, something that I am disappointed about in public, but am cheering  about in private.

I ignored him, since I have no time for someone who has so little self respect, if you have to go out, go out with a bang, not like a whiner on your knees.  Besides, where was the UAW when I needed some help, or John was running?  Oh yeah, you were busy shouting, down with the Republicans. Well, fuck you, asshole, I don’t want to hear from you, you’re against all the free market principles I stand for.  And what do you stand for?  Oh yeah, ripping off your members with that ridiculous 1.15% fee.  Then about a third of that goes to the general fund, which lines the pocket of you and your cronies.   I hate leeches, and that’s what you are.  More than that, I think if we bail out the big three, you need to give a concession too.  Let me think, ok, how about you step down as the head of the UAW, and then you have nothing more to do with the union, and you give back everything you leeched off the union this year?

But of course I can’t just ignore this, because you’re also bothering poor Barack.  So I get this call from Barack, and he asks me to help him.  He says he knows he is asking for a lot.  Like, going against my own principles on free market economy, and then giving a lifeline to a scum like Ronnie, but think about all the workers that’ll be lose their jobs if I don’t act now.  This is for the good of the country, and hell, if that doesn’t work, he’ll raise the money for my presidential library.  He knows that the big three are dinosaurs that deserves extinction, but he would consider it a huge favor if he could dictate the terms of death.  He would like to keep mum on the subject as much as possible since he doesn’t want to interject himself yet into this crass politics he is just getting away from.

I was a bit disappointed to hear the offer on the library, since Barack is supposed to stand for more than this type of politics, whatever happened to the shining city on the hill?  But I told him I can more than pay for my own library.  I’ll think about this, and it comes down to this, either free market principles will rule, or we save the workers to get laid off another day.

So what am I going to do?  I’m still thinking about it.

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